All My Children

The permanent underlying positive ties between parents and children were strengthened at Halloween—after all, adults made this outburst of naughtiness possible and encouraged it, with their merriment barely hidden behind their pretense of being scared. This holiday told children that deep down, despite adult demands to socialize the child, their parents did not totally reject the negative side of the child’s feelings toward them. Continue Reading »

The task of establishing healthy peer relationships

The impact of peers on adolescents cannot be underestimated. The right people crossing their path at critical times can reinforce positive values and enhance the entire process of growing up. The wrong individuals can escort them into extremely negative detours or literally suck the life out of them.

Your job is to pray with utter abandon for the friends your adolescent will make over the next several years. Without being too pushy about it, make every effort to make friends with your teenager’s friends. If your home is the most teen friendly in the neighborhood, chances are the troops will gather under your roof or in your backyard and respond to your influence in the process. Continue Reading »

School and its curriculum

It goes without saying that your teenager’s schoolwork should include the basics: reading, writing, math, history, and so forth. In general, it’s reasonable to assume that your local schools are staffed by men and women who take their job seriously and have their students’ best interests at heart. If your teenager is having problems understanding the material or getting the work done, you will want to review some basic strategies in Special Concerns.

But what if the problem isn’t academics but personality or ideology? What if a particular teacher seems to have it in for your son or daughter, or a class appears to be pushing a political or social agenda that disagrees with yours? What if the family-life or sex-education unit is contradicting everything you have been teaching at home? And, more important, what if your adolescent is subjected to ridicule for expressing a contrary point of view? Continue Reading »

Participation in sports and competition can have many benefits for children: developing strength and coordination, acquiring self-discipline, learning cooperation and sportsmanship, and building friendships. But these activities also have the potential to cause physical injury; generate considerable stress or permanent emotional scars; and nourish a host of negative attitudes, including elitism, hostility, and an obsession with winning. To maintain balance and build positive experiences through sports, revisit the following questions on a regular basis:dren: developing strength and coordination, acquiring self-discipline, learning cooperation and sportsmanship, and building friendships. But these activities also have the potential to cause physical injury; generate considerable stress or permanent emotional scars; and nourish a host of negative attitudes, including elitism, hostility, and an obsession with winning. To maintain balance and build positive experiences through sports, revisit the following questions on a regular basis:

• Is your child really interested in this activity? You may have loved Little League, but your child may prefer soccer.
• Is your child physically and emotionally ready to practice and compete in the sport?
• Is the proper protective equipment available and used at all times?
• Do the coaches and trainers enjoy working with children, including the least skilled? Are they focused on the right attitudes and values (see below), or do they appear driven to win at all costs? Are they competent?

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