All My Children

It is difficult to break away from parents to whom you are close and the adolescent often has feelings of guilt. For this reason the magnifying glass may be used to exaggerate parents‘ faults and attitudes in order to justify breaking away — parents who are too understanding can actually make the process more difficult. Parents who seem unlike the ‘ideal’ parents presented by the media or decided upon by the larger adolescent group to whom the child belongs may be criticized. Many adolescents become so self- conscious about themselves, that this self-consciousness is enlarged to include the parents, who become a constant source of embarrassment to the teenager. This can be a testing time for parents, particularly if they begin to look at themselves and each other through the adolescent’s magnifying glass. Compromise and tolerance are as essential between parents as they are between parents and adolescent, and parents can set an example that is well worth passing on. Continue Reading »

All adolescents go through physical and emotional changes which affect relationships within the family. They can be up one day and down the next. They can be difficult, argumentative and moody, or delightful, helpful and friendly all in the space of the same week.

Adolescents tend to look at life through a magnifying glass. The singer is not just a singer, but a ‘pop idol’, clothing is often extreme, friendships are intense. Those whom they don’t like may be seen as enemies. Feelings within the family are also magnified. Past jealousies and resentments may now be expressed ‘times ten’ and parents of twins can experience considerable guilt at what they appear to have done to their adolescent children. The more they try to placate them, the worse it seems to get. Continue Reading »

Alcohol—the most dangerous gateway drug

In all fifty states, it is illegal to sell alcoholic beverages to anyone under age twenty-one. This is no accident, because for teenagers alcohol is a gateway to a lot more than other drugs.

Alcohol causes more deaths among adolescents than any other substance. About 40 percent of all deaths in sixteen- to twenty-year-olds result from motor- vehicle crashes, and half of these are alcohol related. Overall, driving under the influence is the leading cause of death for people between the ages of fifteen and twenty-four. Alcohol also frequently plays a role in adolescent deaths from other causes: homicides, suicides, drownings, and motorcycle and bicycle accidents. Continue Reading »

Four factors set the stage for adolescent drug use:

Attitudes of parents toward tobacco, alcohol, and other substances. Children learn what they live. Smoking, drinking, and other drug-related behaviors among parents will usually be duplicated in their children.

Attractiveness of drugs. Smoking and drinking are widely promoted as habits enjoyed by sophisticated, fun-loving, attractive, and sexy people— what most adolescents long to become. Illegal drugs are “advertised” by those using them in an adolescent’s peer group. Continue Reading »

During the next few years, your teenager will probably need medical input on a number of occasions. Screening exams for sports, camp, and general health assessment will need to be done. Injuries arising from sports or other vigorous activities may need attention. Problems related to menstruation may require medical evaluation and intervention. In addition, a variety of symptoms and emotional concerns may arise during these years.

Adolescent health-care guidelines recommend yearly visits to the doctor for assessment, screening, and guidance, even if there have been evaluations during the year for other medical problems. Quick exams for camp or sports, especially those done assembly-line style on large groups of adolescents, should not substitute for more comprehensive physicals by your regular health-care provider. Continue Reading »

Alcohol and drug use.Aside from reflecting problem attitudes (rebellion, poor self-concept, invulnerability) that make sex more likely, intoxication also clouds judgment and weakens resistance to sexual overtures.

A steady boyfriend or girlfriend. Strong attachments and feelings of exclusivity invite nature to take its course, especially when physical expressions of affection begin early in the relationship. This is a particular risk in a situation where the boy is more than two or three years older than the girl. Ideally, a take-it-slow approach to relationships can be encouraged and set in motion through conversations both before and during the adolescent years. (This process is discussed at length later in this section.) If a teen romance appears to be getting hot and heavy and a lot of physical contact is already displayed, you will have a more delicate task. You will need to speak with both boy and girl diplomatically but candidly about the physical process they are setting in motion. If you’re too easygoing about it, you will do little to discourage further progress down the road toward intimacy. On the other hand, if you come down too hard, you may drive the young lovers closer together, emotionally and physically. Forbidding further contact (which is much easier said than done) should be reserved for situations in which it is clear that the relationship is damaging, dangerous, or abusive. Continue Reading »

Twenty to 30 percent of American children and adolescents are estimated to be overweight, which is traditionally defined as 10 to 20 percent over “ideal” (a better term would be “appropriate“) weight‘ for age and height or obese (more than 20 percent over appropriate weight). It is important to understand that the significance of a given weight depends not only upon age and height but also on general build and percentage of body fat. For example, a muscular, well-conditioned athlete may technically weigh more than the ideal amount for his height, but his percentage of body fat may be normal or even low.

Normally height and weight are entered on a growth chart as part of routine physical examinations, and very often a look at the pattern of these measurements over a period of time can clarify concerns about a child’s weight. If your child or adolescent is more than 20 percent overweight, a medical evaluation is appropriate, whether as part of a regular checkup or during a special visit. While it is unlikely that the doctor will find a treatable disease that is responsible for the weight problem, it is most important to seek help and begin to work with the child on this problem for the following reasons: Continue Reading »