All My Children

Attraction only to ‘bad’ Girls

There are boys who can feel no physical attraction to a girl they respect or have tender feelings for—they respond only to ‘bad’ girls or girls who would be considered entirely unsuitable by their parents. This disturbance is fairly common—for girls as well as boys—in the early years of adolescence, but tends to wear off in a majority of cases. In a few unfortunate individuals it persists for life. (A persistent case may yield to psychiatric treatment.)

The disturbance is caused by an excessive inhibition of sexuality in the six- to eight-year-old period, when the boy comes to feel a taboo that is particularly strong against any romantic interest in his mother, for whom his respect and tenderness are the highest. Next in order come his sisters and other ‘nice’ girls close to the family. And if, as in most such cases, he has grown up with an unusually strong feeling that sex is a dirty business, this makes it doubly sinful to associate it with good girls or women. All the sexual drive he allows himself to recognise is then channelled towards debased members of the opposite sex. Girls with the corresponding problem can feel no sexual response to men for whom they feel respect and tenderness. Continue Reading »

Varieties of Love

There are at least half a dozen quite different varieties of love, all of which go by the same label. In infancy and early childhood love is principally dependent : the small child is tied tightly to his mother, turns to her for all his wants, feels anxious if she is away for long, is elated when she returns. Though dependent love decreases throughout childhood, there is, of course, still an attachment to parents in adulthood. Even married love has a dependent element in it. Love of God is, in part, like the dependent love of parents, though it usually has other spiritual and mystical qualities as well.

By about the age of three, a child begins to be able to love other children companionably and generously, loves his parent of the same sex with intense admiration and develops a romantic and sexual and possessive love for the other parent. These all come under the heading of spontaneous, outgoing love. Continue Reading »

There are a number of venereal diseases in America and Western Europe. Those which most people know about are called syphilis and gonorrhoea. Another of these diseases which has become increasingly common in Britain is known by the rather long name of non-specific urethritis. There are a few other rare venereal diseases and other minor conditions which can be caught by contact between the sexual organs, but which do not have effects on health nearly as serious as those resulting from syphilis and gonorrhoea.

In the old days a lot of people used to think that you caught V.D. just by having sexual intercourse with somebody to whom you were not married. Some people had superstitious ideas that marriage conferred immunity from venereal disease. Until the last few years it was in fact the case that venereal disease was unusual and caught mainly from prostitutes. But now, owing to the changes in sexual practices which have taken place recently, gonorrhoea at least is the second most common infectious disease in Britain, and a person is unlikely in fact to catch it from a prostitute, prostitutes being particularly well aware of how to avoid gonorrhoea. Continue Reading »

In adolescence in both sexes the skin texture coarsens and the pores (hair follicles) enlarge, more so in boys. Adolescent skin becomes susceptible to acne—more in one individual, less in another. In acne the wax from the sebaceous (wax) glands, which are connected to the hair follicles (to keep the skin and hair oiled), collects in the follicles and hardens there. The top of each plug of wax, mixed with dirt, becomes a ‘blackhead’, which can be squeezed out with the fingernails, with some difficulty and pain. When the pores become plugged, it is easy for ordinary pus germs, which are usually on the skin anyway, to work down and cause infections under the plugs. These first show as red pimples, which later get white tops on them (`whiteheads’) as the white blood cells collect to try to destroy the germs. Continue Reading »

Adolescence Body Odour

Body odours become much stronger in adolescence—partly as a result of glandular changes and skin changes, partly as the result of axillary (armpit) hair on which perspiration collects and is decomposed by bacterial action. It is essential that teenagers, in a society like ours which considers body smells offensive, take a careful soap or shower daily and follow with an underarm deodorant.

Adolescence Hair and Scalp

Sweat is more profuse and oily in adolescence, which means that hair on the head gets to look greasy and straggly in a shorter time. Dandruff appears in winter and may become profuse. The hair should be washed once a week, more often if necessary. If dandruff is troublesome, a dermatologist should be consulted. Continue Reading »

Teenager Ache in the Groin

A boy who is involved in petting which causes him to have erections for long periods without orgasm is apt to develop an ache which seems to be located vaguely in the lower abdomen or in the groin (the groove between abdomen and thigh) or in the testicles. This ache may last for a day or so at a time. The medical name for the condition is varicocele.

Erection of the penis is brought about partly by a constriction of the veins which lead the blood away from the penis. This same constriction causes an engorgement of the veins coming from the testicles and the seminal vesicles and this is the explanation of the ache in varicocele. In Nature’s scheme of things, sexual excitement is expected to lead to intercourse with orgasm, and that puts an end to the constriction of the veins. Continue Reading »

Self-Consciousness and Fear of Illness Several factors make an adolescent uncomfortably aware of himself and worried about his physical and mental health: his rapidly changing body draws his attention inwards. So do his turbulent new feelings. A tendency to guiltiness about sex—even in this day of much greater tolerance— often lies behind his vague fears that he may have harmed his body, that he has acquired a venereal or other disease, that he is losing his mind.

Underlying these factors is the uneasy sense of having lost his earlier identity as a child of the family and of not yet having acquired an independent one as an adult.

A teenager because of such worries has a special need of a sympathetic teacher at school or a social worker, or an understanding doctor or clergyman. Continue Reading »

There are more offences committed per capita in late adolescence and early adulthood than at later age periods, for several reasons. Youths feel a rebellious rivalry with parents, teachers, police and other people in authority. They have a compulsion to prove their courage and independence. Their sexual and aggressive impulses are now fully grown but are not yet fully controlled by the caution that comes—fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it—with experience.

If we want to understand the various kinds of offences for which youths can be charged, we should separate them. First I’ll mention mild delinquencies, of which a good example is petty larceny, which is snitching an apple from the stand in front of a fruit shop or a few pieces of timber at a building site. Continue Reading »

Children Conscience and Punishment

The first thing to realise about juvenile delinquency is that it’s not one type of misbehaviour but an overall term for everything for which an adolescent may be haled into court, from parking offences to murder. It’s as if everything that an adult could do wrong were called adult turpitude, a label which would certainly hinder rather than aid the understanding of different types of adult offences. The reason why all juvenile offences have been lumped together has been to get young people into special courts where, it was hoped, their difficulties could be understood and dealt with constructively rather than punitively; if they had to be removed temporarily from society, they would not be jailed with confirmed adult criminals but placed in rehabilitation institutions. Continue Reading »

Alcoholism is a disease, usually progressive, in which the person has an almost irresistible craving for drink, either in episodes or daily. In each episode he is incapable of stopping voluntarily, so he drinks to the point of incompetence. A great majority of alcoholics eventually lose their jobs because of failure to report for work or reporting drunk. The social disgrace of joblessness and of drunkenness at home and in the neighbourhood, and the tendency of many alcoholics to be abusive at home play havoc with family life. Alcoholics are usually contrite after an episode and full of promises which are never kept. The best record for cures is that of Alcoholics Anonymous, which provides sympathetic companionship, group discussion and a member to keep constant vigil with an individual who fears that an episode is coming on. Continue Reading »